New Year
by shadowjack12345
Summary: A little BBRae thing for people who still occasionally find and like my stuff


**New Year**

Raven surveyed the room from her spot in the corner, out of the way but not hiding. The large room was filled with their friends and colleagues - Titans from around the world. Not all of them, of course, but every year each official Titan team sent someone to take a turn at the Titan New Year party. Raven's eyes caught Starfire floating among the guests with Robin in tow, smiling so brightly no one could fail to return it, not even Raven herself. There was some drinking but not enough to seriously incapacitate - after all, emergencies showed no respect for special occasions.

A burst of laughter drew Raven's attention to the other side of the room - Beast Boy. He and Cyborg had come up with some sort of game involving dice, a space hopper and a plastic cup filled with water. Raven couldn't follow the alleged rules but saw several participants trying to balance the full cup on their head, trying to move on the space hopper and inevitably failing and spilling the water all over themselves. It was messy but everyone, damp or otherwise, was having a whale of a time.

Raven checked the clock - it was 11:45. Time for her to go. As she set down her drink and started to head for the exit, she was quickly intercepted by a concerned Beast Boy.

"Everything okay, Rae?" he asked, squeezing water from the hem of his shirt.

"Yes, Beast Boy, everything is okay," she answered with slight but fond exasperation: they had this conversation every year. The swell of emotions as people celebrated the new year required extra control for an empath like Raven, which meant she needed a break to meditate and focus her mind during the celebration itself. Every year, Beast Boy lamented the fact and every year, Raven patiently reminded him of its necessity.

"I just wish you could share this with us," he moped. Raven sighed.

"I can. I can feel it, Beast Boy, that's kind of the problem," she snarked. Beast Boy smiled at her.

"Heh. Right. Well... I guess I wish I could share this with you, then," he said. Raven blinked at him. This was new. She wondered if he even realised he'd specified only himself in that wish.

Apparently, his crush on Raven hadn't quite abated yet.

Beast Boy's crush on Raven was the most widely-known secret of the past few weeks: everyone knew (because it was hilariously, embarrassingly obvious) but everyone agreed to not talk about it and make life awkward for him. He still though it was entirely secret, though. It hadn't occurred to him that Raven knew about it as well (empath, remember?), just as it hadn't occurred to him that he was about to break Raven's heart.

Her feelings for him were absoloutely secret and, unfortunately for Raven, they were much, much deeper. She refused to assign a word to the feeling, as if doing so would give it power over her, even as she knew it was part of her and would be for some time. She gave him her version of a reassuring smile.

"I'll be back shortly, once the moment has passed I'll be okay," she said, already turning away.

"Could I come with you?" has asked, nervously, voice trembling. She sighed and replied without pausing or turning.

"Sorry, Beast Boy, I think it's best I do this alone." She couldn't see his expression fall but she could feel his disappointment. She knew his crush on her would be short-lived, as all of his crushes were, and found herself hoping it would do so soon, even knowing it would hurt like a bitch.

"Azarath metrion zinthos..." she muttered. Even in thought, her use of any profanity showed she needed to level herself and do so quickly, before the count started. She locked her door, lit a few candles and hovered in the center of her bedroom, chanting her mantra. Like this, she could perceive everyone in the tower, almost all gathered together in the common room. Even like this, Starfire outshone everyone around her, and Raven smiled again. Robin was proud of his place as leader, yet humbled by the people who chose to follow him. Cyborg-

_I wish for this year to throw nothing at us we can't handle._

"What? Robin?" Raven cracked open one eye to be extra sure her communicator hadn't linked to his or something. Nope. Somehow, she was hearing their thoughts or, at least, their wishes. Someone had apparently suggested everyone take a moment to make a wish for the new year and that momentary focus, combined with her own, let her hear him through their mental bond, still there when-

_I wish for no close calls this year._

That was Cyborg. So much for the mental bond theory. His wish seemed quite similar to Robin's - selfless. No surprise there. More wishes started flooding in.

_I wish my team could be like the originals._

_I wish for my home to be safe._

_I wish I could find her._

Raven struggled - as well as the wishes, the feelings and desired behind them were starting to bleed through as well. The balance she needed seemed more distant than when she started. She needed to tune this out or-

_I can't wish for her to love me back.._

"Beast Boy?" she whispered to herself.

_... but I can wish for Raven to be happy, and for her life to be easier._

Raven sighed again, feeling peaceful. He had used his wish just for her.

"How sweet he can be. I just hope he doesn't cringe when he OH!" Raven cried out and gasped as the feeling rushed in behind his words. He so desperately wanted her to be able to join them whenever she wished. He so desperately wanted her life to he happy and fulfilling. He wanted to help her make it that way if he could, and all because he desperately, profoundly, truly loved her. She could hear the count and held her ground as she heard everyone call the numbers in unison, she felt the sweat on her brow as she clenched her jaw with the effort. The count finished, the moment came and, after another minute, the swell started to recede and she could breathe again. She fell to the floor, breathing heavily, and rolled over on to her back to stare up at her ceiling.

After another few minutes, she slowly dragged herself to her feet and walked into her bathroom, looking at her reflection in the mirror. Her fingers went to her face to confirm what she saw: tears ran from her eyes. As she watched, her reflection shimmered and distorted until it wore a violet cloak, a vibrant smile, and those same tears. Raven smiled weakly.

"Yes. Yes, I know."

Five minutes after that, Raven returned to the common room, and easily spotted Beast Boy, already half-jogging toward her.

"Rae! You okay?" he asked warily, not wanting to be brushed off again. His ears pricked up when Raven smiled at him.

"I am perfectly happy, Beast Boy. Perfectly happy." Beast Boy gazed back uncertainly, but a grin slowly emerged. Something felt different here. Something felt new.

And he was pretty sure he was going to like it.

**THE END**

**Just a little, quickly done thing as a little gift to people who still follow and like and favourite stuff every now and then. Thank you.**

**Jack**


End file.
